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Monday, March 11, 2013

Vacilando

"Vacilando," is Spanish for the act of wandering when the experience of travel is more important than reaching the specific destination.

In all my travels, hikes, and adventures I have always had a set goal or a specific destination, something in some way that has put pressure on me to get to a certain place or accomplish a set goal, and if I did not do that then in my eyes I would have failed. I have never set out in the wild, short of day climbing and hiking trips, and let the wind just take me, let my plans and goals vanish. I have always been a prisoner to a goal or a destination, like getting to Canada on the PCT, it did not matter that in 2011, I hiked over 2,300 miles; I did not get to Canada, so I failed. And in 2012, I set out to thru hiked the PCT, starting at the Mexican border again and though I made it to Canada, most days were filled with just trying to reach Canada. Sadly, I have to admit, this pressure did have a negative toll on my days along the PCT, I was after the destination and not so much the journey.
A wise guy who has been helping me with my trek from Artic, Alaska to Terra de Fuego, Argetina, emailed me a few days ago after I emailed him asking for help on planning certain routes for this trip, he told me to let the wind take me, embrace total freedom and be a "vacilando." Of course in some places such as Alaska, the Yukon and the Andes I do need a set route, but he made me realize that for a big chunk of this muitlple year trek, I should throw out specific destinations and goals and just go with it. This is a frightening idea for me, I fear a million things could go wrong if I don't have every inch of the route planned, I mean I am walking over 20,000 miles, don't I need everything planned and figured out? Or can that be a part of the journey, part of the beauty that will encompass this trek?

This summer I will do just that, I will go out into the wild and wander with no destination or goal, soley just for the experience and beauty, when I want to stop or camp, I will, I will not push miles and miles like I have every summer for the past years. I will soak up the sun, ski couloirs, enjoy long warm days with Nanuk, my best friend, I will have no goal this entire summer other than to climb and backpack as much as possible, to enjoy every day I spend outside to listen more, to watch more and to write more. I will enjoy the experience of the moutains and let go of plans, destinations or expectations.

For now, because I am not leaving in April for a big hike, I will enjoy summer in a very different way. It does feel strange, mostly sad that I have no multi 1000 mile trek planned, but my time will come again soon. Who knows this could be the best summer of all??



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